Numerology: some new discoveries of things I already knew

[mellymell]

I've done astrology charts. I've done tarot for years. But I tend to strip the mysticism out of all of these systems and mold them for my own purposes. If for no other reason, astrology serves me as just a point of reference and tarot gives me ready access to my subconscious (kind of a guided meditation). For some reason I never really got around to numerology (probably because numbers scare me, or rather, I just don't get along with them and I always felt it was very subjective).

The place where I get my daily horoscope (mostly for shits and giggles, given that it's about as accurate as a fortune cookie) had a "free sample numerology report" deal the other day, and I did it. Well, their sample report wasn't amazingly awesome or utterly revealing in any way. But the things that were in the report they wanted you to pay for were intriguing. They gave me the numbers, but not the descriptions about what they were all about. So, I decided to do some poking.

I found a site with the very same system they used for deriving their information and he offers it up for free (though prods you on every page to purchase his software for more). Several things are hitting home and I'm feeling some restructuring happening. Of particular interest was when I calculated the "Personal Year Cycle" number for 2010 (which for me is 6). One line read: "May is an emotional month filled with the promise and the stress of imminent changes. June is a breakthrough and a relief." Since May just got finished shitting me out in a pile of pitiful goo, I perked up a little when I read this. Or maybe it was just because I finally got all that yellow stuff out of my head*.

And then, THEN! while reading up on my "Heart's Desire Number**" (which is 8, for those curious), I read this big fat statement of truthiness:

When you are uninvolved or unoccupied with a worthwhile task, you can become deeply despondent, depressed, and frustrated. You are the perfect example of the old cliché, "Idle hands are the devils workshop." Without a challenge, you can lose balance in life and become selfish, cruel, and even self-destructive. Disappointments become shattering, causing terrible consequences in self-image and self-love.

Duh! My aimlessness, disorganization, and utter lack of motivation is causing my depression, not the other way around. It could be said that my life, or at least quality of life, depends on organization. When I cease to care and start to drift, it can be liberating at first, but when the dust settles, this is where I find myself. It's not like I don't have projects to focus on, I just need to do the grunt work first to get myself reorganized. Then I'll automatically be in a frame of mind to accomplish things. I hate to admit it sometimes, but I require structure. I resent routine, but I need it. Organized chaos. Balance.

Maybe with some new goals, I can create the June (and beyond) that my numerology report promises. I mean, "September brings advancement, October self- reflection and readjustments, and December brings a sense of completion and fulfillment." Sounds pretty good, right? Well, I have to make it happen or it's still going to be "[month] shit me out", again and again.

*=(seriously, how much mucus can one human head hold!? took almost if not every bit of 2 quarts of saline solution injected up my nose to finally get it to run clear... and yes, I realize how gross that is, you didn't have to see it!).
**=(see, this is why I have a hard time taking this shit seriously, they have to give them all cheesy new age names)

Comments

[baka-san.livejournal.com]

i smell a list coming... ;)

[mellymell.livejournal.com]

Several lists. List of lists even! ;-) And now that I have a smart phone I can take list making to all new levels of ocd.

[oropher-777.livejournal.com]

I have always been ambivalent about numerology, tarot, and horoscopes, probably because they are never accurate in my case. But then again, I felt the same way about ghosts once ...

[mellymell.livejournal.com]

I think I've always avoided numerology because it feels so subjective. I could see going nuts and starting to pull numbers and meaning out of places where there shouldn't be any. Ever see the movie The Number 23? *twitch*

Astrology is almost always off for me because I'm kind of on the cusp of Taurus and Aries. When I got a little deeper into it and looked into other planets and risings and what not, I found a little more meaning. But my horoscopes are just dead wrong usually and if I look at both Taurus and Aries, they usually contradict each other.

And I don't trust a tarot reading from anyone but me, kind of like I don't trust a dream dictionary. The symbols on the cards mean what they mean to me and context is everything. I can't rely on anyone else to interpret that for me. For the most part, I just sort of use it to sort out things I'm thinking or feeling that I'm having trouble putting into words.

[aranel13.livejournal.com]

Link?

[aranel13.livejournal.com]

Also, I am a walking snot machine. Two weeks straight of this crap. I blow my nose just about every 15-30 minutes.

[mellymell.livejournal.com]

This is the beginning of week 2 of it for me, too. Well, week two of the worst of it. I had some sore throat/lungs, minor sinus stuff for a week before I came down with the horrible cold that put me in this state. After a major assault on my sinuses with a saline nasal wash on Saturday, I'm feeling about 85% better, but I still have a bunch of stuff in my lungs and throat that's making me cough a lot. Other than that, the snot stuff I can handle at this point. It has not been fun and you have my sympathies!

I'm so glad I only get this sick every couple of years. *coughwheezesniff*

[mellymell.livejournal.com]

Do Your Own Reading at decoz.com. When you get to the Personal Year Cycle number, you'll have to calculate the number yourself. Just clicking on the links they give provides you with your number for the year 2005 (oh, so helpful, right?). They've got some free software available that might make it easier to do, but I haven't tried that yet.

[aranel13.livejournal.com]

This is... freakishly accurate. Like whoa.

[mellymell.livejournal.com]

Pretty intriguing, isn't it?

[branflake.livejournal.com]

I did my numerology about 2 years ago and I have to say, it was DEAD on! It spoke of my first marriage and then finding my best friend only to later realize that he was the one for me, blah blah blah. I don't like where it says we'll end up, him dying younger (significantly) than I and I not doing so well with that..... I don't even like to think about it. Glad you're looking up! Love you sweetie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[mellymell.livejournal.com]

The only major thing I see that's obviously wrong so far is this whole "born leader" crap. My Expression number (all the letters of my name added together) is 1 and about half of what it says about that is not right at all. Everything else has been pretty insightful.

So long as you make good use of the time you have, you'll be fine. It's something everyone has to realize when they meet "the one": they won't be around forever, so cherish them while they're here. I also believe there is no system that can accurately predict the future. :)

Thanks, dear, love you too!

[yocepha.livejournal.com]

Played with that site for a little... need to do more, but next time using a pen and paper. Mental math + memory issues = not a good thing these days. ;-)

One kernel from one of the calculations: The year 2005 saw the successful completion of a major project.... hmm... that would be the year that Emily graduated from high school. Homeschool high school, that is. A hugely major project that took 13 years (out of my life)!

*bookmarking site for further reference*

[mellymell.livejournal.com]

Pretty neat, eh?

I had a notepad window open really small to do some of the more complex ones or to jot down any I needed to reference later. But then, you know me and trying to digitize everything. ;)