That was freakin' HARD!

I just finished my first 2x1 mile repeat. The first mile was good. I didn't feel overly tired and after about a minute or two in the walking break between the miles, my breathing was back to normal and I felt pretty good. I mapped my route so that I could swing back by the house during the walking break between the miles. That way I could stash some water by the mailbox. Then I could drop the water off at the start point for my second mile and pick it back up when I finished the second mile during the cool down.

The second mile, though, was extremely hard. I felt I was dragging for the first half of it. Then, as my legs started to give in and decide to cooperate, I suddenly felt like I was going to vomit and that lingered for the last third of the mile or so. I was able to control it with very conscious steady, deep breathing and keep from having to stop, or worse yet, actually getting sick. The interesting thing was, when I finally got to my stopping point, my legs kept pushing me forward, like they wanted to keep running. Meanwhile, my stomach was saying, "run one more step and I swear I will empty my entire contents backwards!" I had to consciously slow myself down. I think it had a little bit to do with it being in the middle of lunch time and I hadn't eaten yet and was attempting a vigorous workout. I've got to run earlier in the day.

Just a note for myself, my first mile was 11:48 mins. and my second was 12:05 mins. I've got one more of these sorts of runs this week, one day of run 5/walk 30 seconds (tomorrow), a 1.25 mile run and a 1.5 mile run. Next week is the last week of the running primer and I should be able to run a steady 2 miles by the end of next week.

Giving up.

I haven't gotten a moment to get any sewing done today and tonight we've got the celebration of three birthdays (Bilbo, Frodo and Paul, a member of our Smial). I knew a few days ago there was no way I'd finish the embroidery. The long hours and late nights I've spent on this thus far is starting to wear on the chemistry of our household. I don't want to try to kill myself for the next three days to get something done that's not even close. I've got other costumes that need things done to them. It will probably take me the next three days to finish the things I have left to do on the other costumes. I can't let this thing take over my life anymore. And from here on out, I've got to be better about slow and steady costuming instead of putting it off until the last month and trying to kill myself to finish something.

I've got the October moot coming up in 4 weeks. I'm certain I can have it done by then and without the long nights and entire days spent hidden away in the office sewing. I can probably spend the 2-3 hours Jonah naps and get it done. I feel a little silly rushing to buy the Evenstar now, but I can't say it was without purpose (this way it goes on September's budget and October's is available now for the wig I wanted). At least I didn't splurge on expedited shipping. I can also now take some time at some point to do some makeup/wig/ear tests. I've never used the German ears I got from Judy several years ago. I trimmed them and put makeup on them to make them look "real" but I've never tried to actually put them on before.

Interestingly enough, I'm not upset about not getting it done in time. Maybe I've just rationalized it well enough to myself to be positive about it. I kind of feel like a weight has been lifted.